Watch this short clip to learn about signs of a possible abusive relationship and what you need to do if you are a victim of domestic violence.
Domestic violence victims face high rates of depression, sleep disturbances, anxiety, flashbacks, and other emotional distress. The first step in getting help is to tell someone you trust. Do Not wait. Speak up against domestic violence.
It can be hard to recognize or admit that you’re in an abusive relationship — but help is available.
I am a psychotherapist providing therapy to Individuals, Couples, Families, and Adolescents in Los Angeles area. I can help you cope with life’s challenges such as, death of a loved one, domestic violence, addiction, family/relationship problems, marital conflict, infertility, abuse, chronic illness, unemployment, etc..
My goal is to assist you in your journey of working towards your potential and improving your well-being, as well as build on your strengths and attain the personal growth you are committed to accomplishing. It is my passion to help individuals move from suffering and hardship to a place of happiness and comfort.
I provide a caring, safe and professional environment for my patients where everything is kept confidential. My experience and areas of specialty include but is not limited to the treatment of depression, anxiety, trauma, relationship issues, addiction issues and, anger management.
If you feel that I may be a good fit for you, contact me to schedule a session by clicking on the link below. I look forward to working with you.
In Western cultures, more than 90 percent of people marry by age 50. Healthy marriages are good for couples’ mental and physical health. They are also good for children; growing up in a happy home protects children from mental, physical, educational and social problems. However, about 40 to 50 percent of married couples in the United States divorce. The divorce rate for subsequent marriages is even higher.
There can be multiple reason why couples choose divorce however, I will focus on the few that seem to be on the top of the list.
1. Poor communication. This is one of the major reasons why divorce happens. Suppose that you didn’t drive a car before and that you used to think that when the fuel pointer points to the E (or empty) then this means that the car needs to be washed! What do you think will happen? Of course the car will stop leaving you in the middle of the street. But do you know what your fault was? You didn’t read the car’s manual. When two people live together they should be able to recognize the different signals that they both send. Both lack of self understanding and lack of understanding of people can cause a horrible communication gap between couples and so lead to divorce.
Distance is created quickly if you don’t share your feelings, don’t tell your partner what’s happening, and keep your feelings to yourself. A successful relationship constantly keeps the lines of communication open.
2. Finances. Arguing about money is the top predictor of divorce. Fights about money are actually fights about deeper issues in the relationship such as power, trust, jealousy, etc. If these deep issues in the relationship are problematic, then the couple may be more likely to divorce. We all have deeply held beliefs about the best way to use money. Sometimes spouses’ beliefs differ and so they come into conflict. Imagine a spouse who feels that money is best used for status. On the other hand, the other spouse believes money is best used for security. This couple would then probably have more conflict. If money becomes a consistent topic of disagreement, the road to divorce is certain. Read More
Do you struggle to get to sleep no matter how tired you are? Or do you wake up in the middle of the night and lie awake for hours, anxiously watching the clock? Insomnia is a common problem that takes a toll on your energy, mood, health, and ability to function during the day.
What is Insomnia?
People who have insomnia have trouble falling asleep, staying asleep, or both. Insomnia is the inability to get the amount of sleep you need to wake up feeling rested and refreshed.
- Difficulty falling asleep despite being tired
- Waking up frequently during the night
- Trouble getting back to sleep when awakened
- Exhausting sleep
- Relying on sleeping pills or alcohol to fall asleep
- Waking up too early in the morning
- Daytime drowsiness, fatigue, or irritability
- Difficulty concentrating during the day
Everybody feels down or sad at times. But it’s important to be able to recognize when depression has become more than a temporary thing, and when to seek help.
The following are a list of the signs and symptoms that may be experienced by someone with depression.
- Feelings of helplessness and hopelessness. A bleak outlook—nothing will ever get better and there’s nothing you can do to improve your situation.
- Loss of interest in daily activities. No interest in former hobbies, pastimes, social activities, or sex. You’ve lost your ability to feel joy and pleasure.
- Appetite or weight changes. Significant weight loss or weight gain—a change of more than 5% of body weight in a month.
- Sleep changes. Either insomnia, especially waking in the early hours of the morning, or oversleeping (also known as hypersomnia).
- Anger or irritability. Feeling agitated, restless, or even violent. Your tolerance level is low, your temper short, and everything and everyone gets on your nerves.
- Loss of energy. Feeling fatigued, sluggish, and physically drained. Your whole body may feel heavy, and even small tasks are exhausting or take longer to complete.
- Self-loathing. Strong feelings of worthlessness or guilt. You harshly criticize yourself for perceived faults and mistakes.
- Reckless behavior. You engage in escapist behavior such as substance abuse, compulsive gambling, reckless driving, or dangerous sports.
- Concentration problems. Trouble focusing, making decisions, or remembering things.
- Unexplained aches and pains. An increase in physical complaints such as headaches, back pain, aching muscles, and stomach pain.
• Let the child know that you are interested and involved and that you will help when needed.
• Turn off the television or put the newspaper down when your child wants to converse.
• Avoid taking a telephone call when the child has something important to tell you.
• Unless other people are specifically meant to be included, hold conversations in privacy. The best communication between you and the child will occur when others are not around.
• Embarrassing the child or putting him on the spot in front of others will lead only to resentment and hostility, not good communication.
• Don’t tower over your child. Physically get down to the child’s level then talk.
• If you are very angry about a behavior or an incident, don’t attempt communication until you regain your cool, because you cannot be objective until then. It is better to stop, settle down, and talk to the child later.
• If you are very tired, you will have to make an extra effort to be an active listener. Genuine active listening is hard work and is very difficult when your mind and body are already tired.
• Listen carefully and politely. Don’t interrupt the child when he is trying to tell his story. Be as courteous to your child as you would be to your best friend.
• Don’t be a wipe-out artist, unraveling minor threads of a story and never allowing the child’s own theme to develop. This is the parent who reacts to the incidentals of a message while the main idea is list: i.e., the child starts to tell about what happened and the parent says, “I don’t care what they are doing, but you had better not be involved in anything like that.”
• Don’t ask why, but do ask what happened.
• If you have knowledge of the situation, confront the child with the information that you know or have been told.
• Keep adult talking (“You’ll talk when I’m finished.” “I know what’s best for you.” “Just do what I say and that will solve the problem”), preaching and moralizing to a minimum because they are not helpful in getting communication open and keeping it open.
• Don’t use put-down words or statements: dumb, stupid, lazy: “Stupid, that makes no sense at all” or “What do you know, you’re just a child.”
• Assist the child in planning some specific steps to the solution.
• Show that you accept the child himself, regardless of what he has or has not done.
• Reinforce the child for keeping communication open. Do this by accepting him and praising his efforts to communicate.
Words of Encouragement and Praise
Chronic illness affects the population worldwide and it is the leading cause of death and disability in the United States. It accounts for 70% of all deaths in the U.S., which is 1.7 million each year. More than 125 million Americans have at least one chronic illness and estimates that by the year 2020, 157 million Americans will have a chronic illness.
Examples of chronic illnesses include diabetes, heart disease, arthritis, kidney disease, HIV/AIDS, lupus, and multiple sclerosis. Many people with these illnesses become depressed. In fact, depression is one of the most common complications of chronic illness. It’s estimated that up to one-third of people with a serious medical condition have symptoms of depression.
The symptoms of depression are sometimes overlooked because they are overshadowed by the illness or dismissed as normal feelings of a person dealing with a chronic illness. Read More
Happiness comes from balancing your mind, body, and spirit.
- Exercise regularly
- Don’t consume too much alcohol and junk food
- Try to get enough sleep
- Clear the heaviness from your mind through meditation, yoga or prayer.
It is also important to balance the time between colleagues and friends. If you only spend time with colleagues and miss out on the time with friends, then your social network is missing.
Similarly, if you spend every minute of your available time with your partner and disregard the importance of buddies, your social life will be impacted. Read More
-Anxiety Expands Personal Space-
We all have an invisible field around us that we dislike other people invading. In front of the face it’s generally about 20-40cm; if others get closer without our permission, it feels weird. But, researchers have found that for anxious people, their personal space is larger. So, don’t charge up too close to anxious people, their “safety margin” is larger (Sambo & Iannetti, 2013).
It seems that many people are confused about Marriage and Family Therapists scope of practice. A lot of you have asked if I am a marriage counselor and work with married couples only. I will briefly go over what is MFTs scope of practice and what kind of individuals MFTs work with.
Having a degree in Marriage and Family Therapy allows an individual to diagnose and treat mental health issues a patient is presenting. A MFT is a psychotherapist who looks at the individual and his/her identified problem(s) or issue(s) within the context of his or her relationships, marital, familial or otherwise. This may include work relationships, friendships, or other relationships outside of marriage or family. Meaning, it is within the scoop of practice for MFTs to treat individuals who are not married or are not involved in a romantic relationship. So, what is MFTs scope of practice? The answer is RELATIONSHIPS. Practically every person is involved in relationships of some kind. Virtually everyone has parents, grandparents, or siblings, or persons in their lives that resemble familial relationships. The patient’s mental state or disorder is regularly either impacted by or may affect these other relationships. Therefore, a patient’s problem(s) or issue(s) can be address within the context of his/her relationships. Thus, the profession of marriage and family therapists.
I hope this cleared out the confusion many of you had. Feel free to get in touch with me if you have any further questions.
Have a blessed day,